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“The last of the human
freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in a
given set of circumstances.” —Viktor
Frankl
Are you happy? If not, what
is the source of your suffering? Do you find yourself
repeating the same negative experiences over and over
again? What is stopping you from removing that which
causes your discontent?
Most of our choices
are based on programs in the subconscious mind—thoughts,
beliefs, emotions, and energy patterns. We are often
motivated without our conscious knowledge to live
out scripts that were either learned in childhood,
absorbed while in our mother's womb, or memorized
in past lives. Some of our problems are the result
of carry-over from the experience of our ancestors
or of entities that have attached to us.
These subconscious programs producing
negative thoughts, beliefs and energy patterns are
part of our conditioning. This conditioning creates
the filter through which we see life. Our positive
experiences remain with us and empower us to function
prosperously in various areas of our lives. However,
it is the past negative experiences and resulting
beliefs that fuel the foundation of our present problems—especially
the ones we see ourselves repeat again and again.
This conditioning,
or brainwashing-without-our-consent (as I like to
call it), is a natural consequence of being human..
We all experience it in some form. From the moment
we are born (or even prior to our birth in this life,
as recent studies suggest), we are quite sponge-like.
As infants and young children, we absorb every
part of our experience—sounds, touch, tastes,
smells, our parents’ faces as well as their
attitudes. We all soak-in our experiences such as
receiving affection, our parents’ arguments,
emotional or physical abuse, severe trauma, violence,
criticism, compliments, rejection, being left alone
too long, being punished too much, having a sibling
favored over us, being permanently abandoned by a
parent, even the past life experience of our deaths,
etc. The list of possible life-molding experiences
is infinite.
With the help of our
parents, teachers, the media, and other societal influences,
we program ourselves according to the way we assign
meaning to our experiences. Through our own fitler
and without a referee or translator, we decide whether
we can trust that our basic human needs will be met.
Our view of ourselves, others, and the world depend
greatly on met vs. unmet needs. Most of our subconscious
motivations are directly related to either getting
back what we missed out on or didn't get enough of
in our past or maintaining a steady stream of what
we did get (both good and bad.)
What are the basic
human needs? Developmental, behavioral and humanistic
psychological literature points to many categories
and sub-categories of basic human needs. In the spirit
of simplicity, I provide the following short list
of needs that researchers find common among humans
regardless of culture—gender, age, race, ethnicity,
religion, sexual orientation, etc.:
Survival
and a semse of safety
Sense of control
and predictability
To have a sense
of Self/Personhood
To feel loved, lovable, valuable, and worthy
of respect
To belong and not be a
stranger
Sense of being connected and not separate
Purpose and meaning in
life
When we sense that one or more
of our basic needs is not met in childhood, we experience
a suffering that we often perpetuate into our adult
lives. Much of the change in the counseling, psychotherapy,
hypnotherapy experience is related to identifying
present thinking or beliefs that keep a person locked
in a pattern of suffering. Once the pieces of this
puzzle are identified, the next task is to go to the
source that created the problem and remove that negative
energy. Under hypnosis, for example, the subconscious
mind is open to releasing the energy of old negative
thought patterns and resulting negative emotions.
Once the old programming is removed, the subconscious
is clear to accept new positive programs thus permanently
changing the mind and the life of the individual.
Regardless of what
you experienced in your past or what negative
energy patterns are attached to you, you have more
control than you think over your present life circumstances.
These words may sound “unreal,” nevertheless,
trust that change can and does happen and that you
can make it happen.
Know that your decision to enter
into counseling or hypnotherapy represents your
desire for change. Simply having the desire to change
creates a forward momentum that evolves into conscious
creation of your own happiness. Counseling and hypnotherapy
are tools, but you truly are the one capable of altering
your circumstances and healing yourself. Your “choice”
to use the power of your own mind is your built-in
key to permanently transforming your life.
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